Spilling your seed, isn’t a sin silly
In fact it’s win/win, one for me one for my willy
Getting nuts prevent us from going nuts
Cum in your system is like power, too much corrupts

And even though I don’t condone beating on your children
I’ll beat my bone til my kids splatter on the ceiling
My unborn drip down, sperm genocide
clean it with a Kleenex or let that shit dry

I like jackin off more than slacking off
And I’m fucking lazy I love me some slacking off
I’m writing rhymes while I should be workin
And when I should be writing rhymes I’m steady jerkin

lotion in my palm it Helps me keep calm
No longer gotta hide the porno stash from my mom



Thought I’d graduate from jackin off to copulation
But internet kept my hand always rotatin
Rubbing, sliding, not sliding rubbers
Sitting by my laptop beatin on my blubber

Limewire Bearshare my old friend Kazaa
Asked them for some pron and in seconds, huzzah!
Stroking my schlong
Imagining my cum on her
Became a reality
When my jizz hit the monitor

I measured how far my load went with a ruler
when it dripped down, I dubbed that a drooler
My dick’s choked like a Dallas team in the playoffs
One from the late aughts, and there’s massive layoffs

Meaning all lays are off, for me for now until I can fool
Some young co-ed into absorbing my tool
Into her twat but for now they’re not
So I keep on churning out my homegrown cock snot



So I didn’t learn how to treat a lady like a man should
But I know how to treat my manhood
Too much time on my hands, I filled em with lotion
Put dick into fist then cum is the quotient

I should’ve been plowing the 40 acres with my mule
But I was at my desktop with nothing but my tool
In my hand and there was absolutely no demand for it
Outcast to just porn, so I grinned and bore it

Beared it, whatever, as long as they’d beer me
I needed to forget about that celibate tyranny
It wasn’t that bad, I wasn’t used to getting laid
On a regular basis, I hadn’t come of age

And I hadn’t cum in ages by the power of girl
Porn stars the most important women of my world
So with a few flicks of the wrist I did a slick trick
And made a milky mixture pop right out the dick tip!